LOS ANGELES, Mar 25, 2002/ --- Last night's 74th Annual Academy Awards broke down doors, broke time limits, and broke every fashion rule imaginable.

So at the risk of being as self-indulgent as Julia Roberts' "I love my life" proclamation last night, here are ours picks for the good, the bad, and the inconceivably ugly Oscar fashions.

-- All that self-styling is burning Gwynnie out. Paltrow, a one-time Oscar goddess, outdid every other actress with her Alexander McQueen creation (which she admitted to finding on the Internet) in a most unflattering way.

While the sheer-illusion top was certainly clever, the ruching made for a wizened nursemaid look, and that braid was downright confusing (are we supposed to find it charming? Intimidating? Intellectual?) And the all black smoky eyes were just so last year.

Our advice: it's time to hire a stylist. And stop window-shopping online.

-- She was a scene-stealer at every other award show but on her big night, the beautiful Jennifer Connelly was a let down.

True, her beige Balenciaga dress was a sexy mix of minimal and elaborate, but even all the pretty ruffles couldn't give her gown the requisite red carpet oomph. Some sparkle would have helped set off the flesh-colored gown -- but instead the matte color just washed Connelly out. The long scarf might have worked better as a shawl -- though we're still not convinced -- but there's no salvaging the lifeless fit of the strapless bustier-inspired top.

Together with the laundry-list-style acceptance speech, the actress was a disappointment. But hey, that little gold bald guy makes for quite an accessory.

-- Among the sea of frothy neutrals, Renee Zellweger stood out as the most elegant black swan on the carpet. The strapless Carolina Herrera gown with pleats and a train was simple, but had plenty of Oscar-worthy drama.

The big diamond earrings were a great accent and her hair reflected the clean yet romantic feel of her dress. All in all, another perfect performance.

-- Of course, Halle Berry was the one to walk away with the groundbreaking Oscar for best actress, but the barely-there Eli Saab creation was a step back in this star's shining fashion history. A very small step, but a step nonetheless.

Still, the mesh top with strategically embroidered flowers showed off her unbeatable body like a charm, and the vibrant skirt and train said pure glamour. And proving that it's not so much what you wear as how you wear it, by the time Berry made it to the mic, she was the most radiant woman in the room. (And that had nothing to do with the two-month confidentiality agreement that everyone involved in making the dress had to sign.)

-- For pure, timeless Oscar style, though, the award goes to Kate Winslet. Perhaps it's that she has perpetrated such unfortunate fashion misses in the past, or maybe it's just that she's finally found a balanced way to showcase her angelic beauty.

Her red Ben de Lisi column gown with a bold but not brash vine of silk roses conjured images of a Grecian goddess. She looked svelte, womanly and sophisticated (which is more than we can say for a washed out, distracted Nicole Kidman).

-- But nothing -- nothing -- beats Jennifer Lopez's 1950s-pinup-gone-wrong ensemble. Sure there's something empowering and refreshing about her flirty, flaunty style, but this too-tight-here, too-puffy there dress did nothing to put the assets she is so famous for showcasing in proper perspective.

As she is wont to do, the diva from the Bronx went for too many bells and whistles -- and way too much hair product. That Brigitte Bardot-inspired bouffant could have doubled as one of the furry frighteners from Monsters, Inc.

Jennifer Lopez at the Oscars	Naomi Watts wearing Gucci	Helen Mirren at the Oscars
Angela Basset and her husband Courtney B. Vance at the Oscars	Nicole Kidman wearing Chanel Couture and Bvlgari necklace

Halle Berry wearing Elie Saab

Jennifer Connelly wearing Balenciaga

Kate Winslet wearing Ben De Lisi

Renee Zellweger wearing Carolina Herrera

Angie Harmon at Morton's party

Marcia Gay Harden at the Oscars